Posts Tagged ‘rant’

Sandwich Rant

Tuesday, August 30th, 2011

What the heck is this? I thought I ordered a sandwich, not an overstuffed baguette taco. How am I supposed to eat this? Does the assembler not know the function the bread serves in a sandwich? What is the point of lining up tomatoes and sprinkling lettuce on TOP (i.e. theoretically, THE SIDE) of the sandwich? Wouldn’t it simply fall off as soon as I align the sandwich the proper way by rotating it 90 degrees? Gravity, HELLO. If I ate the sandwich the way it is pictured, the bread would open up and the entire sandwich would roll open as soon as I bit down on it, making it an extremely wide open-faced sandwich. Do they expect me to rotate my head 90 degrees to the side to be able to eat the sandwich and keep it folded? In addition, the bread only covers 2/3 of the circumference of the cross section. Once I bite, it’s all going to burst out the top. Do they expect me to restrain the filling by pressing it down with my hand? What’s the point of having bread, then? Just make it a burrito! I would have liked to go back, give the sandwich back to whoever made it, and make him eat it in front of me. But alas, I ate it all already.

Shush.

Saturday, February 19th, 2011

Some people talk too much. I’m not sure why, but I think it makes them think they sound smarter that way. These people will spend ten minutes explaining an idea that only requires three sentences or less. They repeat this for each “brilliant” piece of wisdom they have to share, of which there are many.

These are the people that make their coworkers or fellow group members dread sitting in meetings with them. A meeting scheduled for one hour, and is hoped to be finished sooner if possible, will drag on to an hour and a half or more because one person decides to think out loud on anything and everything, with no regard for the discomfort or frustration of his peers. The others are frustrated not only because of the repetitive monologues, but also because they rarely get a chance to voice their own opinions.

The meetings are tame compared to the casual social interactions in which these people participate. I have seen many parties where one person will take the center stage for the entire evening. You can tell that they’re performing a well-rehearsed stand-up comedy act whose bits and pieces they’ve practiced on all their other friends already (and in their heads during those excruciating moments when they are home alone with nobody to hear them). They say things that they think are shocking. When people are not shocked, they present the counterargument anyway, in a heated passion. Otherwise the listener will miss out! It is prudent to eliminate all side conversations so that nobody misses these gems pouring out of their mouths. For three hours.

As an introvert, I have the pleasure of observing this odd behavior silently from a corner and snicker to myself. Do these people realize the looks they are getting from their reluctant viewers? Some are enthralled, but most are rolling their eyes, yawning, checking their phones, whispering to their friends. Some are rude enough to have other conversations amongst themselves. Fools! They just don’t appreciate the genius.

These people often cross the line by offering their opinions on topics about which they know very little. It baffles me how much confidence they can have in something so foreign to them. If there is someone in the group that actually knows about the subject at hand, they can easily continue to argue their point or change the topic to something of their liking. They think they have “won” because the other person gives up.

There is other evidence of these people’s inability to pick up on body language and social cues. You will have your bag in hand, glancing at your watch repeatedly, closely inching to the door, obviously wanting to leave, but since you are still smiling and nodding, this is enough evidence that you are not done listening yet.

I seem to attract these people as my friends, most likely because I am very good at smiling and nodding. I like meeting with these people one-on-one, because it means I can clear my mind for an hour or two without needing to worry about myself. After all, I am not as desperate for attention and acceptance as they are. They entertain me, for the most part.

However, sometimes, it is best to stare them in the eye and say, “Shush.” You may need to say it multiple times, louder and louder each time, because their brains are not accustomed to this novel concept. If that fails, that’s when you slam your fist on the table and scream each time their lips part.

Valentine’s Day

Saturday, February 12th, 2005

It’s that season again where all the cynical people, as if on cue, rant about how commercialized Valentine’s Day has become and how much they hate it. It’s worse if they’re single. OH, and then, they whine about how they’re the only person who thinks this way. Uhhuh, you’re too original! In fact, you’re the only person on earth who hates Valentine’s Day and this makes you special.

Whatever! I think it’s fun! I’ve been single and lonely and ugly on a lot of Valentine’s Days, but I’ve always liked it. On the years I’ve been single on Valentine’s Day, I’ve channelled my energy towards writing Valentine’s Day themed comics.

Comics should be my outlet for just about anything, I’m coming to realize. I don’t draw enough.

alarm clocks

Sunday, February 6th, 2005

In these technological times, why is it that alarm clocks only have two buttons for setting the clock and the alarm? If you accidentally set it to 8:00 instead of 7:00, you need to go through all 24 hours in order to fix it. Also if you want to change the alarm time from 35 past to 25 minutes past, you need to push the “minute” button about 50 times. I don’t get it. Why isn’t there a keypad like they do on microwaves? Or at least a button that makes you go back instead of forward? I don’t get it.

AIM etiquette

Tuesday, April 20th, 2004

Some people should be banned from using AIM because of their lack of knowledge in the area. People who seem completely friendly in real life don’t respond to your IMs an hour after you ask them something. They randomly put up an away message or go offline while you’re on your 34th minute of waiting an answer from them. You ask one question, and they answer it with a short sentence and sign off immediately, while you still had follow-up questions to ask. People like this shouldn’t use AIM, or they should realize that they’re being a total jerk and are inspiring anger inside those who are trying to have a conversation with them. Grrr.

Friday, June 6th, 2003

The first half of my senior year has been spent trying to fit in, and the second half has been spent being disgusted by everybody around me. I should have never put in the effort to even try to make friends and I would have been happy all along. But of course I needed the experience. Besides, humans are social beings so I had no choice.

Yesterday I was sitting in 6th period disgustedly eavesdropping on people’s conversations. Everyone’s running around, making jokes, trying to sound cool, talking about cool things. Then they go out and eat junk food all the time. Ew it’s so repulsive. Before I would have been envious as hell, and fluttered around nervously, trying to capture people’s attentions, trying to be funny and interesting and awesome. But now, I take a look at these people and they look simply pathetic. Did they change, or did I? I don’t remember them to have been this annoying before. I mean, it’s nice to have moderation. I go out and eat a lot too, and I join in on conversations I like. But I never crack fake jokes, exaggerate my emotions, or try to fit into some sort characteristic. I think it’s mostly because I’m not that much of an actor. Yesterday I was sitting there and I didn’t even have the energy to look like I cared. I think acting is an important talent that I don’t have. Sometimes you need to be fake so you don’t look stuck-up when you don’t mean to be.

I’m really disappointed with some of my friends. I watch them and get annoyed. It’s like clusters of people are magnets for these people that are hard to pull them away from. They stand next to “friends,” trying to strike up a funny conversation or crack a joke or two. Long farewells, idiotic fake giggles. Oh man. But when I spend alone time with them, suddenly the pitch of their voice drops to normal, the jokes are more mature (and not in an immature “mature” way), we talk about real things. It’s definitely more attractive than someone acting “cute.”

There are several pet peeves of mine. One of them is when people whom you barely know come up to hug you while saying goodbye. Another thing is, what do you say to someone who says, “Bye, love ya!”? I usually say “okay” because there’s nothing else to say. Well I say “Okay, bye!” But, like, what the heck. If someone says that to me, I don’t feel special — I think, “Man, s/he’s so desperate.”

Anyway, I have no way of knowing if I’m a hypocrite. All I know is that a few people (that I really admire) have come up to me and told me, “Melike, you’re real. It’s so hard to find people who aren’t fake.” Another told me, “Melike’s one of those people who says what you think but don’t say.” I’d rather hear that than a stupid “Love ya!” Now back to that topic, what am I supposed to say, “Love ya too?” Ahh! What do YOU say? I’m too frazzled to elaborate on the topic.

Sunday, January 26th, 2003

The little girl nextdoor has this habit of screaming her head off. I don’t know why. If my kids scream, I will ask them why they’d want to act like such a fool, and refuse to give them what they want unless they shut up and try to communicate with me like a human being.

Thursday, January 9th, 2003

I can’t stop thinking about my teeth. I’m highly doubting what my braces are doing to me right now. Good thing I have an orthodontist’s appointment tomorrow, so this can be resolved once and for all: either I’ll be told that everything is fine, or they’ll change it. I can’t wait!

I’m pretty much used to my braces, though. It’s amazing how virtually nothing gets stuck in them anymore. It’s almost normal, except now I chew “gingerly,” as Sam describes it. 🙂

Anyway, I’m in a very present-giving mood. Not at the moment, but this week. If I had unlimited time and money, I’d probably buy presents for a lot of people.. among other things.

I bought my first shareware program today. For years, I used to cringe at shareware.. why do they ask for money, dangit! But the poor programmers deserve it for all they’ve done. Anyway, I think this transaction was worth it.

I’ll probably go to bed past midnight again. People who don’t have an AM (well.. I don’t have one, but this is the only year I don’t).. okay, well, people who strongly oppose AM give the reason that they need their sleep, they’re not a morning person and they can’t wake up in the mornings. *rolls eyes* Eww, tell that to someone who isn’t me. I’m definitely not a morning person.. I do my best work after midnight, so I usually stay up really late. And really, I don’t wake up by myself unless I get 10 hours of sleep either, sometimes more. People who take AM aren’t those who just wake up at 6:00 on their own. Rather, they’re more disciplined. Sometimes it makes me mad that people who are just unmotivated prefer to blame other things.. everything except themselves.

See now, I blame myself all the time for being lazy and unmotivated, but at least I’m admitting that it’s all my fault!

Wednesday, November 13th, 2002

Okay, time has come to announce another grammatical error that seemingly everyone makes:

When we have a proper noun that ends with the letter s, when using the possessive we still write “‘s” and not just “s”. Example:

Mr. Rhodes’s dog is large.

Sorry. I feel like it is my duty to let those ignorant know.

Monday, August 19th, 2002

I learned a lot at Idyllwild, other than general choral stuff and conducting and the usual amazingness of music.

It was mostly about the passage of time. It was weird. On the second day of Idyllwild, it felt like I’d been there forever, and on the last day of Idyllwild, it felt like it was just the second day.

I learned that I should take the initiative more quickly. Sometimes I really think of a nice gesture, but I don’t do it because I think it’ll freak out the person and make them think, “Why are you doing this?” Because nowadays, it’s considered weird when you go out of your way to randomly be nice, or to talk to someone new. There must always be a motive, it seems. But see, that’s the beauty of it. So I’m becoming more aware of what I feel like doing, and what would make people happier. Because oh man, being nice feels gooooood. There is one random act of kindness I regret not doing, but it’s fine. Next time I’ll tell myself that yes, it is worth it.

I learned that it’s never too late to get started on something. This is why, while I was away, I’ve made plans about semi-big changes that will be applied next year. Another important thing is that I have all the time in the world. Really now, I’m only sixteen. That’s funny. Look how far I’ve come so far. I will surely do many things with my life in the next ten years, and hopefully in the years after that. Ten years, you hear that? Ten years ago I was six years old. I mean geez, if I want to get two PhD’s, why would I even begin to worry that I’m going to die? But it seems like the Idyllwild thing again. When I’m old, I’ll feel like I’ve only lived for twenty years, which ties back to the “it’s never too late” thing. I just have to stop procrastinating on life.

I also learned about myself and how people work. These past few years I’ve always felt like if I talk, then nobody will ever care. In fact, they’ll be angry with me for ever opening my mouth to ruin the stretch of time I took to tell them something. Heck, that’s what it’s all boiled down to for me, and I do feel that way about most people too. But there are some people out there who do care, and you never know unless you go up to them and tell them hi. So far, most of my efforts of conversation have been shut down, but as an alto told me, you should always give it a try, and screw it if they turn out to be jerks and forget about them. And that is exactly what I’m going to do, and I’m not going to act cowardly when it’s time to do it; even if it kills me.

Speaking of jerks, I discovered I need to handle criticism better. I was depressed for two hours and on the verge of tears just because this viola player said crap about one of the songs we sang. It just makes me sad when people say bad stuff about something someone has created, and the composer has told us all about its significance that exact morning. But it’s okay, I’m over it. Oh yes, and it’s dumb to hate something you are performing. You may be forced to perform it, but if you want to do a good job at it, you should like what you’re playing/singing. I think it’s a complete waste of time not understanding the good, magical side of the music you’re producing and spending all your time saying how much you hate it. Sorry to say that it wastes nobody else’s time but yours. I think it’s necessary that you like what you play/sing. It’s horizon-widening. I don’t know how much I’d like DuruflĂ©’s Requiem if I didn’t perform it myself. It really put me in the middle of it, and I got to see the technical side of it, and as a parttime scientist, I really enjoy looking at the technical details of things.

Well, those are most of my philosophies I created in Idyllwild. Well, not created, but improved on. It’s really hard to find the perfect balance. Sometimes harmony comes naturally, though.

And one last thing I learned is that I’m afraid I’m semi-willingly trying to strip myself of many emotions. I’m usually very romantic, with big ups and downs in mood. I’ve been trying to cut it down so that I won’t get as hurt by certain things, but I also don’t like how little reaction I have to many things. Cynicism is a good defense, but most of the time it’s quite pessimistic and depressing. Just the fact that I’ve become cynical for this past year tells me how weak I am. It’s been a really emotional two weeks for me. The music and the experiences were beautiful, and I was often moved to tears during rehearsal and other events. I love it when I’m near tears. Actually, I wish I actually did cry. Feeling tears there but not having them come out is very frustrating. I don’t know how to de-strip myself of emotions. Most of the time I hate making a fool out of myself, and people think I’m weird too, and stupid for getting offended by little things or taking some things very seriously. But they’re feelings, man. Sorry if they’re irrational, I can’t help it. Not like I can’t think rationally, I can. And this is what you get if I’m rational. Terse responses to IMs among other things. You just can’t expect me to open up to anyone anymore; I feel like I’ve been hurt too much.

Idyllwild also took my mind off of a lot of things and I’m very grateful for that. It’s good to have a huge break without any obligations, unresolved problems, and promises. Well, mostly so.

But, of course, those are just my thoughts. I’m sure you would probably learn other things if you had gone to Idyllwild.