- home - about - drawings - music - quotes - blog - links -
(türkçe)

soha:

My bubbly, fun friend from way back in middle school. One of my best friends.

---

"A guy asked me out on a date for a morning hike. I haven't responded in two days. I just wanna go eat!" - Soha

"I donate $20 a month to LA Fitness now, and I don't go." - Soha

"Do you know he married a woman named Beebee? I almost cried when I heard that." - Soha

"I can't decide if I want one or not. I want two." - Soha

"I'm going to put a picture of him on the fridge, so whenever I see him, hopefully I'll make a better decision. Although yesterday I was thinking about him while eating chocolate, so that wasn't good." - Soha

"I like your glasses. Blue usually doesn't look good on a face." - Soha

"Okay, how do I look on a scale of 1 to fat?" - Soha

"That was the moment I realized I'm never going to kill myself, which really sucked." - Soha

"I did 'rape' once, and the person stopped playing with me." - Soha, about Scrabble

"Melike, you know how you say you hate people? I'm beginning to understand what you mean by it." - Soha

"Have you ever driven past where a skunk has died? I have. It smells so disgusting that it makes my farts smell delicious." - Soha

"I called the time of death for one patient. It was kind of cool." - Soha

"I hadn't had breakfast that morning, because I had to use the restroom. I had to pick and choose only one." - Soha

"I know one magic trick: I can make food disappear." - Soha

"I've been depressed lately, but I've been working on it... by not doing anything." - Soha

"Let me tell you how hungry I was. Somebody was puking behind me while I was eating, and I didn't care." - Soha

"It was a calculated move, I think. He's a mathematical man." - Soha

"I've hugged a tree before. I needed a hug, the tree was there, so why not? It was cleanish." - Soha

"Sorry... The chair is pricking me like a prick does." - Soha

"I don't wanna date a stick... ass.. stick-assed guy. Stick-in-the-ass, there we go." - Soha

"We haven't gotten to the punchline yet. There was a punchline, and I was the line." - Soha

"I've only liked two Asians in my life, but they were hot Asians." - Soha

"A guy came up to me and lamely said, 'Hey baby, can I be your derivative, so I can be tangent to your curves?' So I looked at him and said, 'Only if I can be your triple derivative, so I can see how much of a jerk you are.'" - Soha

"I've had Caesar salad before, but this salad smelled like fish. It was as if the lettuce had been sitting there all day, wilting, next to a dead fish." - Soha

"Sometimes, I feel like my boobs are choking my neck." - Soha

"Somewhat. Somewhat's better than nowhat." - Soha

"First of all, I don't even know why it's called To Kill a Mockingbird. There's no bird in here." - Soha

"Your science brain is impeccable and coveted by people such as myself." - Soha

"I hate going pee. I feel like it's a waste of my life." - Soha

"When I first started driving, I was a much better driver. I wanted to be perfect. But now, I don't give a rat's ass if I live or die." - Soha

"That's lesbionic." - Soha

"I'd rather eat than drink calories." - Soha

"The closet had Rachael Ray stuff in it, that had Justin Timberlake on the cover... with lard..?" - Soha, about her dream

"If he's bi, then he's gay-bi more than bi-bi." - Soha

"I should study now. Maybe somehow the intelligence will kick in." - Soha

"I'll kill you with niceness, but she'll kill you with bitchiness." - Soha

"I just exploded. There was an explosion of Soha." - Soha

"As a friend, I think you shouldn't do it. As a whore, though, I think you should do it." - Soha, giving me advice

"People think I'm dumb. Compared to your friends, I'm like Jessica Simpson." - Soha

"I would love to give you a butt massage." - Soha

"Sorry, I'm getting all physiological." - Soha, who meant to say 'philosophical'

"Let's read what my fortune cookie says: 'Reaffirm your faith in financial plans. make a budget.' Fuck you! Tell me I got As on my finals." - Soha

"Do you like how I make fun of human beings?" - Soha

"Why's it crowded? It's Vons." - Soha

"Melike, don't start something you can't stop." - Soha

"That's a real tree, and it's real barks." - Soha

"No kissing you! Go wash your face, and then we can talk." - Soha

"I changed my laugh, too. I had to mold it to society's needs." - Soha

"I make friends with just about anything." - Soha

"I always tell the truth... I just extend it sometimes." - Soha

"Don't judge, just opinionize.. they're two different things, right?" - Soha